Thursday, December 29, 2011

MIA-Mommy guilt

I had planned to do so much this week of Christmas vacation: clean out closets, goodwill donations, paint the livingroom, several blog posts, visit friends. Then sickness struck. I've spent the majority of the vacation dealing with a sick baby. Yesterday, we were both sick-not a fun day.

Today, I did what I swore I would never do. I took my baby to daycare even though I have the day off. He was in such a great mood this morning. Happy, playful, inquisitive. I, on the other hand, feel like a dump truck has parked inside my chest. I'm hacking up lovely globs of goop, I'm achy and exhausted. So I got dressed, gave him breakfast, played with him for thirty minutes and hopped off to daycare where I left him happily diving in the toy basket with his friends.

Mommy guilt however, will not allow me to rest. I can't fathom snoozing the day away while munchkin is at daycare and not with me, so I've been trying to sweat out the sickness with some major housecleaning.

One part of me is ready to fall on my face. The other part of me is enjoying the deep clean feel that is so hard to achieve in small bursts of time and/or with a little one underfoot.

At the risk of being a super bad mommy, I think I will allow myself a nice steamy bubble bath when I'm too pooped to clean and then go get the munckin. I'm trying to justify him being away from me on a day off: deep cleaning the house, I'm sick, he's out of routine with this week away from daycare so one day will do him some good, I'm paying the full week anyway, its playtime with his friends, etc. It's not working but I'm trying.

Do you ever get a babysitter/daycare on a day off? Do you have Mommy guilt over it?

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