Friday, April 9, 2010

Going Without

I got married at 28 yo. We started the before my 29th birthday with the hopes of having a child before 30yo. Then it became hoping to be pregnant before my 30th birthday.

Then I got desperately plastered on my 30th birthday.

I turned 32 yesterday. I still don't have a baby nor am I pregnant.

Life sucks a big fat donkeyball sometimes. People ask me what I want for my birthday and I can't tell them because no one can give it to me and it just makes it awkward for them.

No one understands that its awkward for me every day of my life because I can't unthink the things that I do.


  1. I hate my brain sometimes..I am always thinking these same thoughts. I was so excited that after waiting a year and a half that I would have my babies before I turned 30. Now I doubt that I will get pregnant again before I am 30 in September. My BFF (who has a 3 month old) told me that I will be a great mom that I am a natural...well it doesn't feel natural taking temps, checking CM and ferning. I doubt I will get pregnant again without any help. Happy Belated Birthday, I wish you could have had your wish.

  2. I don't have words to say to make it better. But, I love you and I wish I could fix it all for you.